The promises that I can promise to promise...
- I will never smoke another fucking cigarette again.
- I will never buy "fat free" anything, unless it's naturally fat free, like saliva, tears or cabbage.
- I will never really buy saliva or tears, I will continue to make those on my own for free.
- I also will never buy those 100 calories packs of cookies or low fat anything, unless it's naturally low fat like a communion "body of christ" wafer or a quarter of a vegan cookie from pattycakes.
- I wouldn't really buy communion wafers.. wait, yes I would. Those are carbs, I love carbs. Holy carbs, even better! win win.
- I will drink water out of my "comfest" mug several times a day. NOT Pabst Blue Ribbon, several times a day.
- ^ I will still pee... a lot ^
- I will probably hate myself a lot and wonder why I am even trying.
- I will not lie to myself about what I am eating.
- and I will try my best.
