Quitting cigarette smoking didn't give me much to talk about (shocking, I know) so I've decided that I hereby am consecrating all of my shitty habits to this blog, potato & pabst practitioner...
Let's take a gander of my quitting meth, shall we?
Day one- I quit smoking cigarettes. Oy, this is hard. *flipping off everyone... even babies* I already hate my once happy life.
Week one - PMSing and extremely homicidal *grunting & swinging at people who smoke to watch them flinch. Babbling random cuss words at old people because they are sooo effin sloooow. Mocking, the stupid happy dogs who bark and wag their tail, with an extreme look of disgust to their owners. "yap. yip. yap. yip yippe ki yay mother fucker, shut your happy dog up"*
Week two - on my period (yay), so I am still crabby (yay) yet now I proved that I can trigger some sort of Bi-Polarism (yay) because I also cry like a baby (yay). *weakly fist pumping like a new jersyan* No one knows the pain. I literally day dream of jumping up & down on happy thriving people. This is especially true with humans aged between 2-5 years old because they switch on their bi polarism too and I hate it! *frothing hate juice from my mouth* "are you happy or a sad piece of shit? You know nothing of pain!" then I easily toss the kid 70 miles into the sky.
Week three - I smell and eat everything. nom nom nom. everything tastes so different! I can smell everything too. Trees are scented! Water has a scent. Rain oh glorious rain and sharp cheddar, how wonderful you smell!!! I smell and eat everything!
Week four - smoking sucks, the end. *bowing*
