Amazeballs

*romantic music playing*

Pea shoots & amazeballs (hemp and chia coated blueberries) kale, green peppers, spinach with one egg cracked on top, topped with a hunk of feta a side of GF toast and a pom tea. 

I don't think it could get any healthier or delicious than this. 

*sucking face with my monitor*
for now I must bid you adieu, fear not... I will eat you again my love. 

AMAZEBALLS

2 tbsp coconut oil (liquid)

2 tbsp of hemp

1 tbsp chia seeds

1/2 c. frozen blueberries

mix oil and seeds then toss blueberries in the coconut oil will harden and coat your balls with amazing seeds. 

the end.

EGGS

brown onions & green peppers, toss in ribboned kale, wilt some fresh spinach then top with one egg, do your salt and pepper dance & cover. duh. 

TOAST

google it. 

Can I get a woot, woot?

I'm just gonna go ahead and brag about my juicer. Is it possible to really love a machine so much? 

example: I slaved over opening 3 pomegranate fruits today.

All 3 combined made over 2 and a half cups of beautiful ruby seeds

my beauty

okay, the boy is pretty beautiful too

 that's the pulp. that's it. It's the size of a raccoon's turd or squirrel?

My hairy face man and spawns drank down the juice while I ran upstairs and sanded my bumpy face with the turd pulp. 

Ahh, a spa moment.

I really love my juicer. 

-The End

here or there or everywhere?

Everywhere! I wasn't sure which blog this post should be posted to so I went with both.

This is what lack of nutrition, being in the heat and a bad death stench can make my child do...
http://urrrma75.blogspot.com/2012/05/not-for-weak.html

Jesus, take the wheel, I've done it!

I perfected the perfect base for my batches of granola!
The secret is the roasting/cooking ingredients/method. It's the best granola base I have ever eaten in my life and I'm not going to modify it all anymore! Dont believe me? Ask the family passed out on my floor, shaking with happiness. Now that the base is perfected, coming up with the combinations of fruit/flower/seeds should be easy. After countless tries of yummy but mediocre bases, I do declare, that I cant believe I've done this!

look at how perfectly shiny, crunchy, healthy and yummy that base is.
Raw almonds, pepitas & sunflower seeds with unsalted peanuts, flax, toasted oat bran and rolled oats. 

I'll shout the recipe to you as you are falling off a ledge or roof but otherwise this is going to be my family recipe secret for me to pass down (unless you ask Anya, she cant keep anything a secret). I kid, come on over and eat it with me and then I'll share the secret...  aaaand bury you alive when you too, shake & pass out from yummy happiness after eating this. PRO- you'll wake up with the recipe, CON- you're 6 feet under, no one can hear your screams.

I'm disturbing.
xo

keep it real

old school stuff

don't smoke or do drugs

avoid alcohol

drink lots of water

exercise

keep nutrition HIGH & the calories LOW 

so eat your daily servings of fruits and veggies

re-teaching myself daily how important nutrients are

trying to start with 3 to 5 servings of fruits and vegetables daily

perhaps one day I'll learn to exercise daily as well

1 cup broccoli, 1 packed cup spinach or trimmed kale

a cup of strawberries and a 1/2 or 1 whole banana

1/2 tbsp hemp seeds or oil (optional of course)

3/4 to 1 cup of your fav milk (i usually use coconut unsweetened but the almond was already chilled)

blend 

drink/chew/eat... enjoy

spiked water for princesses

I love how refreshing a cold glass of water is but I also am always sticking random things in there as a happy little surprise. I'm the Bob Ross of water, artsy. 
cucumbers
green pepper
strawberries
oranges
grapefruit
a splash of brewed cinnamon & cloves (that one was really good I need to make it again)
sprigs of mint
lemons, of course
but today... a splash of rose water.
Rose Water! I feel like I just tonsil hockied with a fresh cut bouquet. My breath tastes and smells so good. For someone who is sitting outside in the humidity with frizzy hair and no bra (i'm not wrestling with that thing in this heat) I sure feel like a poofy princess with this breath. I feel like dancing a ballroom dance, so pretty... but with the no bra, I'll just keep my eyes closed and keep humming to myself, tasting and smelling my breath.
Try it, come mentally dance with me.

Live long and prosper, spawns!

Hay, Paula, Paula Dean...

what did your kid eat for lunch, shuga?

 Mine ate this, swallowed down with their glass of  WATER.

Avacado,  green peppers, tomatoes, green onions
and homegrown alfalfa/chives mixed sprout & pea shoots.
oh and brocolli and cucumbers,spinach and kale... on sprouted toast
& an orange.  

I think I have every right to brag about my perfect humans. I never grew up eating this healthy stuff and look at me. I'm a few pecan pies short of looking like Paula and her hubby. I never want my kids hating their bodies like I did/do mine. Never too late to change (for me) but it's also never too early to start (for my spawns). Sure they love pop but they also pretty much love every single raw vegetable and fruit available. Just gotta know how to mix/cut and prepare it. 

Yay, health. 

Orange you glad...

... that I'm posting something?

Purely accidental but I guess today's theme is orange and brown.

A sweet potato
with cloves, cinnamon
and burnt caramelized  onions.
*foaming at the mouth*
so good.
the end.

deviant plans...

I have to get more 'cardio', as you hip folks say, in.

car·di·okärdēō  

adjective no. no, this is very much a VERB. 

is physical activity (see! verbage words. physical and activity) which raises the heart rate to around 60 to 85 percent (wtf?) of the heart's maximum (does that say maximum?) heart rate for an extended period of time, usually twenty minutes or longer (911 is on hold and please tell my children I loved them)

Dr. Dude, I cant even fathom lifting my feet off the ground so how the (a whole bunch of expletives) am I  going to run, jog, walk, crawl, drag myself down the block or even out of my yard?
I'm going to start taking my pulse when I'm stressed out to the max and pray for a miracle since my brain runs 987,658,991,018 miles a second, it really should be some form of exercise. 

My quick deviant brain tells me other ways to raise my heart rate... I could always try and:

drive towards oncoming traffic

tap dance on a land mine field 

fall down stairs

slap then run from the po-po

trip

give a 4 year old a loaded gun

look at baby animals

lick an electrical outlet

put on pantyhose or wet bathing suit

stab a toaster

hire someone stand behind me and yell Boo! in the dark

have vans with tinted windows drive by slowly

take off pantyhose or wet bathing suit

touch Jarred Hasselhoff... or David

slip in the tub

stub my toe

sit on a washing machine (if it shakes my guts, brain and heart, it's cardio. I said so)

...for 20 minutes a day. 

No, Campbell. This is a vegetable soup.

Ingredients that I used
2 cloves of garlic, minced
1 large onion, minced
3 organic carrots, scrubbed and chopped
4 celery stalks, chopped
2 yellow, red and orange peppers (remove seeds & chop)
1/2 head of green cabbage (no matter fancy, savory or reg, chopped)
1 large canned tomatoes (I used the tomatoes that I canned this summer)
1 bunch of organic kale (remove stalk from tip to end, it's too chewy)
1/2 bunch of spinach (trim the stems off, stems make it bitter)
5 or 6 cups of water

use a large heavy pot. brown onions and garlic with a few tablespoons of water. add peppers, celery, carrots, cabbage with a cup of water. Let it cook and wilt a bit. Add the tomatoes and remaining water (depends how strong or weak you like it. I like mine like a chunky stew so I add 4 cups) Add the Kale when water boils and I added the spinach to the bowls right before serving because it looks purty.

You will hate this soup if you are not a vegetable fanatic...Jerrick will only drink the broth, Brian gags at the smell or thought of it and Anya loves the whole thing if I add a teaspoon of nutritional yeast in her bowl. I will mosey up to the store to buy zucchini and squash and add it along with brown rice or barley for dinner. This will last me till tmw, woot!

homemade canker sores

if you dont get canker or cold sores here's how to get a fake one.

Pineapple, kiwi, mango, lemon juice, buddha hand fruit zest, papaya, coconut

Eat slowly, savor it... feel the acid burning your tongue, ding! canker sore :).

nom nom nom